My 4th

I don't go out. I don't watch TV.
I wear earplugs to block out the sounds
of all the fireworks. I sit at home with
my head buried in pillows, repeating,
"What the hell went wrong?" over and
over again all night long. And why? Well,
the truth is I'm a Loyalist, for lack of a
better word. I actually think this nation
would be better off if we hadn't broken
from the crown. I mean, one glance at
the news will show you clearly which
country is more fucked up than the other.
England may still have some of those
dark, satanic mills of old but that just
doesn't even hold a candle to having
Satan himself as your leader. Even
though they always told us the Devil
would take the form of a person we
never expected, I'm sure none of us
thought for an instant our president
was even smart enough to actually be
Evil Incarnate. But now we know:
Lucifer is an imbecile; that's why
he was kicked out. No wrong doing,
not at the time anyway, aside from being
a baboon in angel's clothing. After he was
seen with his new set of horns, of course,
he became much sought after by people
and angels everywhere who'd had their
hearts ripped out one way or another.
It is so appalling to me to watch the
morally bankrupt behavior perpetrated
in the name of us, the people, that I can
think of nothing better to do--won't you
join me--than to stand right up and
announce with utmost sincerity:
long live the goddamn queen.

(2006)