Facebook

My big accomplishment for the day:
I flirted with 55 of my friends
on Facebook. I meant only to flirt
with one but, you know how it is,
sometimes things are just a little
unclear. I went to my profile:
"Adam has just flirted with 55 friends."
What! Some kind of perfect justice.
The one woman I hoped to tempt
didn't even get a wink (well, I did
set that straight). Just goes
to show: sometimes when you've
got your eyes on one person,
it's really the whole mass of
humanity which should be your focus.
Hence, if you've got a choice,
flirt with everyone. Why
shouldn't I focus my desires on
the sole object of my fancy? you
might ask. It's quite simple. Because,
and you'll just have to trust me
on this, even if you wanted only
one person, it just wouldn't work.
For one reason or other; either
you'd hit the wrong button,
or you'd press the wrong button,
and the whole house of cards
would come tumbling down.
Take my advice: flirt with
everyone; today could be your last chance.

(2008)