Perks of Being a Playwright

5. You can write out your life and people will listen.

4. You can write in little details, like your love of breakfast ham, and folks will listen.

3. You get to create fictional realities and only pretend they're real (without anyone knowing for sure).

2. You get to have characters called "floozy" and "hussy" and it's OK.

1. Set the play underwater and everyone will follow you there (Scout's honor).